Diabetes Blog Week: What Brings Me Down

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I’m participating in Diabetes Blog Week this week.I’m hoping these prompts will re-inspire my writing and encourage lots of blood sugar checks 🙂

May is Mental Health Month so now seems like a great time to explore the emotional side of living with, or caring for someone with, diabetes. What things can make dealing with diabetes an emotional issue for you and / or your loved one, and how do you cope? (Thanks go out to Scott of Strangely Diabetic for coordinating this topic.)

This is a hard topic to cover in a succinct or eloquent manner. I’m anticipating the fact that I’m about to let myself explore the many tough (emotional) aspects of diabetes — and I’m okay with that.. because that’s life and because I’ll balance it out tomorrow with positive. Work, appointments and my new addition of SCHOOL (more on that another day) called for this morning to begin at 4am. It’s a list kind of day.

Emotional Issues
-Judgment by those who don’t know better (or even those who do..).
-Guilt due to high blood sugar. Or low blood sugar. Or forgetting to put a new bottle of strips in your purse. Or change your pump set, or refill your glucose, or call in a script. You catch my drift.
-Not feeling 100% — fighting with yourself to push through they day and not let diabetes hold you back from doing something.
-Wondering why your sugar is high or low. Troubleshooting.
-The financial impact of diabetes.
-The impact that ALWAYS PLANNING has on your well being. I never stop thinking.
-Fear of the future and what complications it may (or may not!) hold. When is the future?
-Fighting with food. Being pissed that I *shouldn’t* eat that burger because my blood sugar is over 200 mg/dl. {“But I don’t like to let diabetes hold me back from doing things! But I also don’t like to feel like shit, and I want to prevent complications” (see, mind always racing).}
-The simple fact that this impacts my husband.
-The incurable-ness of this disease.
-Seizures in the middle of the night. The indescribable feeling of mortality that envelopes you when you finally realize what just happened and why you’re lying in a pool of apple juice and sweat. (I honestly don’t know if I’ve ever experienced a worse feeling than this.)

How I Cope?
-Exercise that I love. Yoga, especially.
-Eating well — and being excited about the things I eat that I know are good for me.
-A fabulous support system made up of my friends, my family, and my superhero husband.
-Escaping reality for a bit with a good book.
-Writing this blog. Reading your blog.
-Continuously learning.
-Reminding myself that I can do this. So can you.
-Calling my sister (also T1) for a diabetes bitchfest.

Are there other things that make this disease emotional? Hell yes. Do I cope in more ways than what I listed? Absolutely (and some of the ways may not be healthy, like pretending I don’t have diabetes for an hour, or longer).

The most important thing to remember? I’ve come this far, and I’ve got all of you behind me. I’m not just a diabetic, but I wouldn’t be the person I am today without diabetes (for instance, maybe I wouldn’t be such a planner!).

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