being proud.

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Yesterday’s post was all about how nervous I was to go to my quarterly endo appointment (answers to my list of questions coming soon). I’ve been feeling really unorganized as far as my diabetes was concerned, and I just knew my a1c would show it. I’ve worked REALLY hard the past couple of years to finally get my a1c to stay in the 7’s and then in the 6’s. Last appointment I went from 6.1 to 6.3, and I was OK with that. What I didn’t want to happen at yesterday’s appointment was to feel like all of my previous work was for nothing. I didn’t want to see an a1c in the 7’s again — NOT because an a1c in the 7’s is bad, by all means, pat yourself on the freakin’ back if you’re there — but because I would have felt like I was starting all over again on the ‘i’m going to lower my a1c to below 7’ train.

(Let me say it again. You should be so proud if you have an a1c in the 7’s. You should be so proud if you are happy with your a1c number. You should be so proud if you are working on a number you are not happy with. You are working on YOU every day, and YOU SHOULD BE PROUD OF THAT. Each day is a new day. Each test is a new test. My personal mantra is that we are all doing the best we can, with what we have, at any given time. YOUR a1c DOES NOT DEFINE YOU, please never let it. One unit at a time, kay?)

So, when my wonderful, fabulous, amazing endo walked in to the appointment room and asked me how I was doing, I replied with a monotone “I’m OK.”

“Five-nine?” She said.

OK. Is she stating my current blood sugar in mmol? Did the nurse write my height as 5’9″ instead of 5’0″?

I sat there for a minute, probably with my mouth open – and she pointed at the computer screen. “I’m not reading that wrong, am I? It says a1c = 5.9%, right? Are you upset?”

I’m still in shock. And not totally convinced that I’m not anemic and therefore producing a false result (she assured me it’s correct and I’m not anemic). But holy crap, I’m going to let myself me proud of that.

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12 responses »

  1. I’m so excited and proud of you!!! You, and the rest of the local ladies, have really inspired me to get my numbers in control.

    (and don’t you just love Dr. McN? She was so bummed last week when the nurse had told me my number, haha.)

    • Everyone I’ve met around here is one of the things that keeps me motivated!

      Love love love her. Hoping my new insurance will prove to be less of a hassle cost wise and I can keep seeing her! I don’t know that I’d trust anyone else to see me through being preggo… when we’re at that point.

      BTW, she gave me a very unsolicited green light yesterday. Couldn’t help but laugh at her, haha!

      • Sure sure sure!! 🙂 Funny, I asked my endo the same thing today – just because I’m so tired and wondered if my B12 was low. No signs of anemia, so I can’t blame my tiredness on low B12 – maybe it’s just being busy and having a toddler?? 🙂

  2. Pingback: nicotine patches & grapes. | life: one unit at a time

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